For Christmas, everyone will get a small parcel of swine flu delivered into our bloodstreams.

Oh yes, I mean, IF we are already sick. And IF we get in line early enough. And because only 140,000 doses of the bug are sitting in Serbian vials, by a rough calculation, there is one shot for every 57,142 people.

ANNOUNCEMENT: Due to the new law on traffic, I am currently in the market for trading in my car in exchange for an elephant. Please contact this blog with photo and details. Camels also will be considered. No time wasters please.

Given that the newly sanctioned traffic cameras will apparently be rolling all the time, there will be no place for the White City's traffic cowboys to hide. By cowboy, I am referring to the guy in the black Audi, with no license numbers, slaloming from right to left to right lanes at 130 kph while talking on one cell phone, texting on another, lighting a cigarette, changing the cd music, and wearing dark glasses behind tinted windows.

In order for me to have taken this photo - which I recently did at a Belgrade toy emporium which will remain Nameless for Legal Reasons - several Stupid Things had to happen.

First the manufacturer had to come up with an idea for a game. He proceeded then to "invent" tic-tac-toe. Realizing, as he must have, that even in the People's Republic of Some Country which will Remain Nameless for Legal Reasons people played this game for centuries already, he had give it a marketing spin. "Let's make it a LEARNING game, Mr. Chang." Mr. Chang (not his Real Name) then thought about it for awhile and came up with this:

Where does the line get drawn?

The passing of Patriarch Pavle, for whom all the respect paid to his memory was and is well deserved, allowed for some rather questionable decisions on the side of the government and media in Serbia.

In Iceland, they have a name for it.

It is the feeling of seasonal depression when the days start getting short and nights start coming sooner. "Skamm" means short, "degi" is day, "thung" is heavy and "lyndi" means mood.

Skammdegisthunglyndi

When the umpire shouts "Play Ball!" at the beginning of the game, the players react by standing still. Nine guys waiting to bat. Nine guys standing ready in the field. A lot of standing.

The World Series of Baseball is underway between the 2008 champion Philadelphia Philies and the 26-series winning New York Yankees. And while I do not think I am the only one in Serbia to be watching the Series, the club seems to be rather small...

When people say "supposably" in a sentence, my teeth begin to grind. In the same way, every time I hear people - intelligent people, educated people, intellectual people - using the term "NATO Pact," my head starts to throb. Right there behind the eyes.

Just to be clear: it is called a "pact" because it is an agreement. It is called the Warsaw Pact because it was signed in Warsaw.

Winter clothes. Summer clothes. Bags in, bags out. Sweaters, wool trousers, heavy suits, dark colors to absorb the watery winter sunlight. T-shirts, shorts, short sleeves. And do I really need this t-shirt that I could wear for the last time in the last century? Hm...

On Friday, I will not be eating.

According to many, this might be a good practice for me every day, but I will be hungry on Friday because I just added my name to the Hunger Strike Against Hunger action set for Friday, October 16, 2009.

This is a time for considered reflection.

Given the events in Belgrade of the last couple of weeks - the seemingly random attacks, the last-minute suppression of the gay parade - it does not seem a time to speak out and be heard. We should all stop and consider what we have allowed to happen here. I had not planned on writing on this subject as it has been thoroughly talked about, but I happened to find this in my reading, which I thought might be relevant.