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Instinct to Violence

Chris Farmer RSS / 27.06.2015. u 16:55

One phone call was all that was needed to introduce violence into our home.

We needed movers. We called a few. We agreed a deal with one. He came, he forgot the deal, and he began threatening to "beat" us when we insisted. He said that he had beaten his mother that very morning. He held the thing we had to move hostage. He added, just for information, that he was a "woman-hater."

All for €20.83.

Are we such base creatures that violence is the only possible answer to conflict? When the Croatian border was closed for mysterious technical reasons for four hours last week, immediately people began to cut the line, pull up in front of others (i.e., us) who had been waiting for 3 hours already, and - when I rebuked one of them - he growled like an animal and tried to hit my car with his.

The main problem is that we are, in the main, forced to acquiesce to this kind of daily violence. If you call the police, they will most likely come back and beat us for real. That is assuming the police would even bother to intervene. If we answer with violence, people will get hurt and nothing will ever be done about it. The one certain thing is that we would no longer be safe.

I would like it to be known that this is not just a rant. I would like to do something about this, but I have no idea what. The mover was an illegal business - meaning that no legal recourse is possible. And even if there were, he would probably be scolded and I might even pay a fine myself for using him.

I will not publish his name here - it would very likely end up with his arrival at my door with other bullies. But if anyone needs a man with a truck to do some moving in Belgrade, please let me know, and I will tell you who he is so you can avoid him. In a world which I have always thought to be evolved from proto-human behavior, I am genuinely shocked by this recourse to threats and violence.

And before any of you respond by telling me to leave the country, that "this is Serbia," or accusing me of generalizing, I would like to say that this kind of response is NEVER acceptable under any circumstances anywhere on the face of the planet.

Today we held our ground and no fists were thrown. But I cannot just shrug my shoulders and think we got off lucky. I urge you, if you have read this all the way through, to oppose this instinct. Do NOT accept or entertain violence as an answer.

Because it is not. It never is. 



 Read more blogs by Chris Farmer on The Standard Deviation


Komentari (3)

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srdjan.pajic srdjan.pajic 01:39 28.06.2015

All for €20.83.

For the moving? Was it just for some piece of furniture, or a piano, or that was for moving whole house?

Just curious...

I had movers hired two times so far, the same company, really great experience. It is very competitive market here where we live, so they tend to be really nice and professional, and they waste no time. But they cost 100$/hour, with their own truck. And they moved my whole household in 4-5 hours from one town to the other, didn't break anything, though we had boxed all our shit in advance.
zarebor50plus zarebor50plus 11:10 28.06.2015

Ranting vs Acting

Although I'd rather skip using of the argument you've mentioned (This is Serbia), as this is actually not Serbia, but some - even if there're many of them - people (as such bullies, punks and ruffians are always the problem, everywhere, only we have them in greater numbers, or so it seems sometimes) I have to say just that - this is unfortunately Serbia. So much so, that even you have lost your guts and chosen to cover it up rather than speak up with all details, call the cops (in spite of the risk they might be those punks' best buddies)or confront the bully in any way. As long as all so called - by themselves, mind you - normal, ordinary people choose NOT to act, all that can be done is to grape, to lament and to write a blog posts like yours, which is essentially The Book of Complaints. In other words, you may either rant and complain, or act - your choice.

Of course, that there's another possibility - call your lawyer to handle such cases legally. You'll keep your hands clean, if that's worrying you. And this may very well be done very discretely.

Remeber, after all, your Founding Fathers (as you're from the USA) - they did not rant, but rather shoot the English, thus getting the independence. Can you imagine them confined ONLY to writing how the taxes on tea were really unacceptable? USA would stil be a colony.....
Chris Farmer Chris Farmer 21:39 28.06.2015

Re: Ranting vs Acting

Ok. Right. Let’s look at this…

“Lost your guts”
You seem to be an advocate of the very kind of violence that I am opposing.

“Cover it up”
I do not feel anyone is served if I wave a name and number here on my blog. That is a sort of populist nonsense that, again, leads to continued violence. I do not intend to start a witch hunt.

“Call the cops”
Excellent suggestion. The police do not care about threats. Otherwise half the country would be in jail, and the other half waiting to get in.

“In other words, you may either rant and complain, or act - your choice.”
Exposing a problem, calling attention to a problem, is action. And I will act in other ways which are none of your concern. But I would point out that “put up or shut up” also leads again to violence.

“Call your lawyer to handle such cases legally.”

Finally, if you consider the problem of senseless violence and bullying tantamount to war, then I suggest you seek counseling. Wars are fought with guns and bullets. Social change is brought about with words and civil action.

Ask Martin Luther King and Gandhi.